matilda pick up lines

. To stand up and be proud! BIG KID [BEN] Do you think you could tell me what two times twenty-eight is? The scene unfreezes. Agatha Trunchbull: Son, one day, you're gonna have to earn your own living. ALICE and HORTENSIA Oh, yeah? MATILDA All grown-ups get scared, just like children. Oh, that's where it's at! [into recorder] Every day starts with the tick of a clock. "I don't have any muggle money, but I do have a sickle and two knuts.". To survive this mess by Being a prince or a princess. I've had them since I was big enough to Xerox. Her father was a doctor, and he needed someone to look after things at home. I have to tell you, Headmistress, that it is my intention to help this little girl. Back before my life had ended, And remember to be eXtremely careful. The announcer from MISS TRUNCHBULL's videos starts commentating. I'll be watching you, each and every one. Every new life MISS TRUNCHBULL Oh, hello, Miss Trunchbull. She'll call a truce, Bruce. . Harry Wormwood: Harry Wormwood: Every life I bring into this world Agatha Trunchbull: MATILDA, LAVENDER, and NIGEL raise their hands. Now, look at you, and look at me. You'd better hide! Come on! Prettier barrelina! Not even when the hammer left my hands Ev-er-y life is unbelievably unlikely. Two, three, four! "There's more than one Whomping Willow at Hogwarts, you know.". Zinnia Wormwood: Okay, my boy, heir to the throne, today we diddle the customer. And I shall crush you. Yes, please. MATILDA CHILDREN DOCTOR MISS HONEY Who would be here to sign for the packages? I'm the best! And sailed high up, up above the stands [sometimes, to be in time with the music: Well? 105 Cute Pick-Up Lines That'll Make Them Smile And Text You Back Melanie Gervasoni and Saimonas Lukoius Oh shoot, here we are again. No kid likes being yelled at. LAVENDER puts the wooden spoon back in his hand. She laughs. BRUCE It was the biggest burp I had ever done. Oh The end is happier. BOTH: What a dear! MATILDA collects two dolls from the house. four hundred and eighty-seven. MRS PHELPS exits with the blocks. | This boy, Bruce Bogtrotter, is none other than a vicious sneak thief! . CHILDREN BRUCE turns around and burps for a full ten seconds. So they say. What am doing here? That was Miss Honey. <> MATILDA [to Zinnia] Merriam-Webster defines a "pick-up line" as "a prepared remark used by a person to start a conversation with a stranger they are interested in having a romantic relationship with". I am GUILTYwhen the Headmistress says I am GUILTY.". It was the age of wisdom . Matilda: You are guilty, because you are a fiend. I'm gonna sue you, I'm gonna burn down your showroom! WOMAN: Well, take another! But the thing was, I was having a lot of trouble with my belly. You and your father think you can make a fool out of me! "I have a pen, you have a phone number. He surely can't! [looking at a portrait of her father] The ESCAPOLOGIST starts to walk in from the back of the stage. I think he blinked. The table stops and the hands hit the ground. Where's his fingie? Hey, dip face. It must be wonderful for a child to be so wanted. They then saunter off. Agatha Trunchbull: [They start chattering. google_color_border="EDC7C2"; Look what you've done, you stupid woman. I'll tell ya, six hours a day of school IS NOT enough. I? We never thought it was possible, 1. And when you scream, you don't know if the sound came out, MISS HONEY is left in a pile stage right. [on the phone, yells] BIG KIDS enter menacingly behind the gate. | Why would you want to read when you got the television set sitting right in front of you? This calls for a proper smoke. National Green Hair Day! The most common thing in life is life . "I'm right and you're wrong, I'm big and you're small, and there's nothing you can do about it.". We're rehearsing. See how they shine? MISS HONEY I need to talk to SOMEBODY besides our stupid kids! BIG KID [BEN] We'll wait until she's gone, then we'll go get your doll. Mrs. Wormwood: Why, why, why, why, why, why, why? And . Who the hell do they think they are? No, Miss Trunchbull. Harry Wormwood: What?! . Matilda: And if I couldn't teach, I'd have nothing at all. We never thought it was possible, Miracle! If I give the crowd their money back, where is my profit?! Bruce Bogtrotter: MISS TRUNCHBULL runs in, blowing on her whistle, and chases ERIC down until he is pulled into formation by two BIG KIDS. We cannot simply place her in the top form with the eleven-year-olds. How about this. If you always take it on the chin and wear it, All right. Think about what you want to say, and then say it in a creative, original way. There's more the second part. We must find out how it ends. Not a dot did I stray from the plot. [He drags Matilda, throwing the book aside, to where Zinnia is]. 9. Harry Wormwood: The CHILDREN and BIG KIDS line up again. Funny Tinder pickup lines. ERIC, TOMMY, and BRUCE And . No one is as bold or tough as me. So she's learned a few tricks. MR WORMWOOD Agatha Trunchbull: Get up, get up, get out of here, give me that book. If you were six-and-a-half, you'd be in school already. CHILDREN MATILDA grabs her books and runs off the front of the stage. Harry Wormwood: The chances of existence almost infinitely small. MRS PHELPS is sitting on a block and MATILDA is standing on one, holding the two dolls. A NURSE is holding a baby, which cries. . Look at that! BRUCE It's time you learned the family business. Good-bye, Mrs Phelps. Make him stop! MATILDA THE MUSICAL. [off to the side] Jenny: . Just knock on the door. Trunchbull: I'm the best! Shut up! How dare they speak to me like that! 4. What about rules, Honey? Doesn't mean that you just have to grin and bear it. Maybe I shouldn't tell you any more. MISS TRUNCHBULL's office, complete with her in a high-backed chair (facing the back of the stage) is wheeled in. And honestly, I was really, definitely, sort of, almost thinking about owning up. ;)Don't forget to SUBSCRIBE to our. MRS WORMWOOD What about the Russians? It is flanked by AMANDA and ERIC in lab coats over their costumes. . My idea of a perfect school is one in which there are no children at all. Okay! It's the mileage. There's another crime in the making, your car is about to run a stop sign. If you sit around and let them get on top, you I am *not* seven years old anymore, Aunt Trunchbull! It is, is it? Dip face! MRS WORMWOOD That such frequent miracles don't render each one un-miraculous? . MATILDA sits to the side, reading a book. Agatha Trunchbull: I think she might be an idiot. Flipping, filthy, nasty, stupid Russians! Mustn't let a little thing like "little" stop you. It was like the entire world went silent for that The DOCTOR runs behind the table with the others. in . [bends down] Before my happy days were Over, The time has come to put that tumbly-tum to use. A little less zzz, a lot more zing. Behind MR WORMWOOD and MATILDA, the scene changes from a living room to MATILDA's bedroom. Matilda: Zinnia Wormwood: [insulted] [Matilda comes home from school, excitedly. Don't hide it under a bushel. . Miracle! I have a nice house, a wonderful husband and you are slaving away teaching snot-nosed children their ABCs. You've gotta learn to listen up, kid. Now, get off to bed, you little bookworm. [She puts the book in the cupboard and hurries to the hat rack with a bottle reading "sooper gloo". NIGEL, TOMMY But time is the one thing no one is master of. Me, me, me, me. [while putting baby Matilda in the sink to rinse away spinach] That's why here I have compiled the sexiest and smart pick up lines to use on guys to make them interested in you! Fifteen times two is thirty. Whoa! off to prison you both shall go!". Yep! What we all suspected. Harry Wormwood: Of course! One should avoid confrontation when possible. and look at reading. MISS HONEY I am trying to pull off the biggest business deal of my life and I have to listen to this. Agatha Trunchbull: Get in the car, Melinda! But I shan't enjoy it, because of the despicable way in which you have spoken to me tonight. "Just when I catch my breath, you turn around and make me lose it again." Any woman would be flattered with a remark like this. With an owchie . 3. Knock on the door, Jenny. WHY ARE ALL THESE WOMEN MARRIED? [to his partner] MISS TRUNCHBULL //-->. DOCTOR One day Jen, you'll see that everything I do is for your own good. . And it isn't wide enough to sit. That's right, sir. ACROBAT [off-stage] [everyone in the room except Miss Trunchbull and Miss Honey join in]. Isn't there something you can do? I'll come back later, then. It's called "Moby Dick", by Herman Melville. [She gets on all fours as RUDOLPHO rides her like a horse.] She has never seen a! [Matilda and Miss Honey arrive at Miss Honey's cottage]. Is a miracle! Matilda: Come in, come in, whoever you are. Are you smoking a cigarette? It's not trash, Daddy, it's lovely. Back before my life had eNded, What? For those idiots out there who don't know how to play, here's how it goes. I think they do it deliberately, just to annoy me. In the slip of a bolt, there's a tiny revolt. MRS WORMWOOD Matilda: MISS TRUNCHBULL Hand's shaking. No one like a smart-mouthed girl like me. I'm gonna give you a tanning like you never had in your life! A spotlight makes its way across the letters on the board, finally settling at the end on the letter Z. No kid likes being yelled at, but it was precisely Harry's ranting and raving that gave Matilda the key to her power. . The entire assembly will stay five hours after school and copy from the dictionary! MISS HONEY Her mind? "The books transported her into new worlds and introduced her to amazing people who lived exciting lives. TOMMY Doesn't mean that you just have to grin and bear it. The alphabet? You're going to hug all the air out of me. MATILDA Miss Honey: MISS HONEY, dazed, follows the dance as best she can. "We have everything that the world has to offer," said the wife. MISS HONEY, BIG KIDS, and CHILDREN The world's greatest acrobat! . RUDOLPHO saunters over and holds his arm out to MISS HONEY. CHILDREN and BIG KIDS appear in the boxes to the upper left and upper right of the stage and sing. Jul 25, - Barney Stinson's Harry Potter pick up lines. School? Harry Wormwood: Didn't we? This miracle . Look, I don't suppose we could exchange it for a boy, could we? For this newt you pin-worm! . The children begin to pop up from behind the table and speak. You're a liar and a scoundrel, and your father's a liar and a cheat, one of the most corrupt lowlifes in the history of civilization!