george carlin quotes government george carlin quotes government

George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) Its interested in its own power. "I have a right, you have no right, we have a right." Folks I hate to spoil your fun, but. George Carlin, The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. The consent submitted will only be used for data processing originating from this website. The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other in opposite directions. George Carlin, 87. Whats that, a bonus? When he is not writing in his favorite coffee shop, Igor spends most of his time reading, traveling, producing house music, and capturing light with his camera. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. var ue_mid = "A1PQBFHBHS6YH1"; I think TV remotes should have a button that allows you to kill the person on the screen. Its so fuckin heroic. George Carlin, Most people work just hard enough not to get firedand get paid just enough not to quit. George Carlin, Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out. George Carlin, If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre going to have selfish, ignorant leaders. George Carlin, Theres no present. its only a symbol. But there is an I in independence, individuality, andintegrity. George Carlin, If its true that our species is alone in the universe, then Id have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little. George Carlin, The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity. George Carlin, Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. When youre born in America, you get a front row seat. George Carlin, 48. But once youre born, youre on your own. (function () { Save the trees, save the bees, save the whales, save the snails. The next time they give you all that civic bullshit about voting, keep in mind that Hitler was elected in a full, free democratic election. George Carlin, 66. They want more for themselves and less for everybody else, but I'll tell you what they don't want: They don't want a population of citizens capable of critical thinking. George Carlin. Who the fuck is going to invade the US? Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid." 2. Boy, these conservatives are really something, arent they? American If the parent corporation doesn't want you to know something, it won't be on the news. Igor is a SEO specialist, designer, and freelance writer. George Carlin has many famous quotes about government, education and the American dream that are often referenced as truth. It presents itself as fairness, yet attempts to restrict and control peoples language with strict codes and rigid rules. So, we must be clear about our expectations for government and its role in our lives. Yeah, I know, youre thinking. George Carlin died on June 22, 2008, from cardiac failure at the age of 71. What do you say? Its interested in its own power. We havent tried that for a while. You know what they ought to do with churches? function getCookieWithoutJQuery(name) { Theres a humorous side to every situation. stylesheet.type = "text/css"; Then you live in an old age home. Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough not to quit. George Carlin, 21. They own, and control the corporations. 125 George Carlin Quotes 1. At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. "Events.Namespace": "csa", How are YOU going to tackle today? Every person you look at; you can see the universe in their eyes, if you're really looking. Soon enough youll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, You show me a lazy prick whos lying in bed all day, watching TV, only occasionally getting up to piss, and Ill show you a guy whos not causing any trouble. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, I have lots of ideas. if (isRetina) { Share your thoughts in the comments below! We would love to hear your thoughts, so dont be shy and comment below! q("i", arguments) Just daydreaming. [CDATA[ George Carlin was posthumously awarded the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor in 2008, after he passed away that year at the age of 71. But there is an I in independence, individuality, and integrity. George Carlin, 14. Authors. Life gets really simple once you cut out all the bull shit they teach you in school. George Carlin. George Carlin's full name was George Denis Patrick Carlin. window.csa("Events")("setEntity", { Im not sure thats the way to fight discrimination. Interview with Todd Leopold, edition.cnn.com. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. George Carlin "The planet is fine. if (window.ue && window.ue.tag) { window.ue.tag('author:quotes:signed_out', ue.main_scope);window.ue.tag('author:quotes:signed_out:mobileWeb', ue.main_scope); } // var source = getCookieWithoutJQuery("source"); Famous quotes on life, death, politics and of course the American government. "//securepubads.g.doubleclick.net/tag/js/gpt.js"; Carlin was noted for his black comedy and his thoughts on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me. Everyone smiles in the same language. George Carlin, 35. And apparently Im not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions.George Carlin, Im completely in favor of theseparation of Church and State. These two institutions screw us up enoughon their own, so both of them together iscertain death.George Carlin, I dont have pet peeves I have major psychotic fucking hatreds.George Carlin, I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, Wheres the self-help section? She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.George Carlin, If your kid needs a role model and you aint it, youre both fucked. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Its important in life if you dont give a shit. A good motto to live by: Always try not to get killed. } The challenge is to find it.George Carlin, I put a dollar in a change machine. My motto: Fuck Hope! George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Im happy to tell you there is very little in this world that I believe in. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, If everyone in the world sat quietly at the same time, closed their eyes and concentrated as hard as they could on peace and goodwill, all the killing and cruelty in the world would continue. 4. Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out. Deal with it. George Carlin, One can never know for sure what a deserted area can look like. George Carlin, A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff. George Carlin, I dont have pet peeves I have major psychotic fucking hatreds. George Carlin, Some people see the glass half full, others see it half empty. I hate a group of people with a 'common purpose'. We all need to let loose and laugh at things once in a while and making other people laugh as well as think and find meaning behind your jokes is an exceptional talent George Carlin has. When you step on the brakes, your life is in your foots hands. It doesnt only represent the good things. The planet is fine. 2023 Inspirationfeed. Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music. George Carlin, 4. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. Disclaimer: As an Amazon Associate We earn from qualifying purchases. Theres only the immediate future and the recent past. George Carlin, 22. And armbands. Or, at the very least, it will be slanted to suit them, and then rarely followed up. " Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. Nothing is mentioned, though, about cursing a lack of candles.George Carlin, When someone asks you, A penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?George Carlin, The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.George Carlin, Life gets really simple once you cut out all the bull shit they teach you in school.George Carlin, I have as much authority as the Pope. "ObfuscatedMarketplaceId": "A1PQBFHBHS6YH1" Governments don't want a population capable of critical thinking, they want obedient workers, people just smart enough to run the machines and just dumb enough to passively accept their situation.You have no choice. The real reason that we cant have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse: You cannot post Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not commit adultery, and Thou shalt not lie in a building full of lawyers, judges, and politicians. Political correctness is Americas newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance. Im not sure silencing people or forcing them to alter their speech is the best method for solving problems that go much deeper than speech. If black boxes survive air crashes why dont they make the whole plane out of that stuff? George Carlin, 55. } The people are fucked. George Carlin, May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. George Carlin, Some people have no idea what theyre doing, and a lot of them are really good at it. George Carlin, Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity. George Carlin, We have multiplied our possessions but reduced our values. In his 50-year career as one of Americas most poignant and provocative social critics, the irreverent actor, author and comedian left no sacred cow unsinged as he took to lobbing one grenade after the next into the comfort zones of American life. Laugh often, long and loud. Heres all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. Cause pretty soon they have little hats. The table is tilted, folks. Actually, I think that class was called Religion. George Carlin 'Political correctness is fascism pretending to be manners.' Quotes are added by the Goodreads community and are not verified by Goodreads. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. 101 Marianne Williamson Quotes That Will Enlighten You. I have certain rules I live by. Im not sure silencing people or forcing them to alter their speech is the best method for solving problems that go much deeper than speech. George Carlin, 62. Some people have to go to work and dont have time for all that. George Carlin, 24. Dont look for it. You have owners. George Carlin, 84. if (window.Mobvious === undefined) { Nothing changed.George Carlin, Well, if crime fighters fight crime and firefighters fight fires, what do freedom fighters fight?George Carlin, I think its the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately. } If you vote and you elect dishonest, incompetent people into office who screw everything up, you are responsible for what they have done. They own, and control the corporations. They spend billions of dollars every year lobbying, lobbying, to get what they want. } else { My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me. So, I dislike and despise groups of people but I love individuals. //]]> The planet is fine. The people are fucked.George Carlin, A good motto to live by: Always try not to get killed.George Carlin, Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.George Carlin, I think I am, therefore, I am I think.George Carlin, Everyone smiles in the same language.George Carlin, People who say they dont care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they dont care what people think.George Carlin, Conservatives want live babies so they can train them to be dead soldiers. Dont just teach your children to read Teach your children to question what they read, teach them to question everything. born on May 12, 1937, Im talking about the real owners now the real owners. Its totally FREE. "https:" : "http:") + Some people have no idea what theyre doing, and a lot of them are really good at it. George Carlin, 42. Its so fuckin heroic. George Carlin, 18. The reason I talk to myself is that Im the only one whose answers I accept.George Carlin. The people are f***ed. Were so self-important. var stylesheet = document.createElement("link"); Use your fucking heads! he must of been a brilliant man mostly misunderstood by most people wish i would of met him in person one on one, 51 Best John Muir Quotes On Nature, Mountains, Trees, 50 To Kill A Mockingbird Atticus Quotes With Page Numbers, Happy Birthday Nephew Images With Quotes, Wishes, Messages, Happy Birthday Daughter Images With Quotes, Wishes, Messages, Good Morning Happy Monday Images With Quotes, Wishes, Cute & Romantic Happy Birthday Love Images For Him, Her, Happy Birthday Dog Images With Quotes For Your Puppy, Happy Birthday Niece Images With Wishes, Messages, Quotes, Depression Quotes Images | Feeling Sad Pictures, Wallpaper, Happy Birthday Son Images With Quotes, Wishes, Messages, Happy Birthday Husband Images With Quotes, Wishes, Messages For Hubby, Good Morning Quotes Images To Make Your Day Beautiful. The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept. George Carlin, 13. }()); The quality of our thoughts and ideas can only be as good as the quality of our language. George Carlin, 25. If holy people are so interested in politics, government, and public policy, let them pay the price of admission like everybody else. It will not be with jack-boots. Toothpicks?George Carlin, No matter how you care to define it, I do not identify with the local group. If youre born in America you get a front row seat.George Carlin, Dont sweat the petty things and dont pet the sweaty things.George Carlin, If its true that our species is alone in the universe, then Id have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.George Carlin,Napalm & Silly Putty. Did you ever stop to thnk about all the people we kill? You know why? And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid." George Carlin "Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity." George Carlin I dont have to tell you it goes without saying there are some things better left unsaid. The first one is: 'Never believe ANYthing the government says.' George Carlin Believe, Government, Rules To Live By 48 Copy quote Tell people an invisible man in the sky created all things, they believe you. init: function() { You have no choice. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, Wheres the self-help section? She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. George Carlin, 43. The first one is: 'Never believe ANYthing the government says.'. Before, all you had to go by were these 14 quotes. George Carlin, If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?George Carlin, I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. Laugh until you gasp for breath. Theyre all in favour of the unborn. Nobody seems to care. What do you get at the end of it? Carlin and his "Seven dirty words" comedy routine were central to the 1978 U.S. Supreme Court case F.C.C. When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. var ue_furl = "fls-na.amazon.com"; Hes not a cheese. googletag.pubads().setTargeting("surface", "mw"); return true; Electricity is really just organized lightning. George Carlin, 20. Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Weve added years to life, not life to years. George Carlin, 6. You have owners. Did you ever stop to think about all the people we kill? But he loves you. Deal with it.George Carlin, Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.George Carlin, He and if there is a God, I am convinced he is a he, because no woman could or would ever fuck things up this badly.George Carlin, I dont know how you feel, but Im pretty sick of church people. Im sure it made the work seem that much more urgent. George Carlin, 27. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. } What are your favorite George Carlin quotes? When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. q("f", arguments) Or, at the very least, it will be slanted to suit them, and then rarely followed up. George Carlin, 64. George Carlin political quotes may seem sensitive, but they inspire necessary conversations. The people are fucked! George Carlin, 80. if(cookiePair[0] === name) { The big wealthy business interests that control things and make all the important decisions. If you cant beat them, arrange to have them beaten. Enjoy! George Carlin was an outspoken comic, known for his brash sense of humor, foul language and controversial views on politics, religion and other sensitive subjects. Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. But again, because of the small budget, in science class we couldnt afford to do experiments in order to prove theories. The only person who is with us our entire life is ourselves. George Carlin, 33. He was an American standup comedian. 3140. Political correctness is Americas newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance. Those who decide what news you will or will not hear are paid by, and tolerated purely at the whim of, those who hold economic power. //]]> To me, authority is something that a freer spirit, a more independent mind, and a person who can handle the world, doesnt need guidance from. Sooner or later the people in this country are going to realize: the government does not give a f**k about them. 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